writing reading and life

About a year ago, I opened up about my struggles with depression. It was a challenging but necessary post. Reflecting on it now, I feel compelled to revisit this topic, recognizing the power of sharing our experiences. While everyone’s journey is unique, the act of expressing one’s struggles can resonate with others facing similar challenges.

A year ago, I found myself in a dark place. My depression seemed to be spiraling out of control, presenting me with a choice: succumb to the ease of giving up or seek medication. In 2014, my creative pursuits dwindled, especially toward the year’s end. I had endured a couple of challenging years, grappling with episodes of depression without the right medication, all while navigating deeply personal issues. The idea of consulting doctors lingered at the back of my mind for a long time. However, I understood the dangerous path I was on and the potential consequences. Having attempted suicide in the past, I spent a week in the hospital, extending beyond the mandatory 72-hour hold, as they wanted to ensure I left in a better emotional state. I was determined not to reach a point where I’d contemplate it again, especially after my father-in-law’s tragic suicide just a couple of years following my attempt.

Depression and suicide are conversations laden with difficulty. The mere mention of my father-in-law’s suicide prompted me to step away momentarily. I couldn’t bear the thought of putting my family through another ordeal if I didn’t seek help – the same path I was heading towards without intervention.

Eventually, I sought professional help. Initially, I believed my depression was causing the overwhelming pain I experienced, and the doctor prescribed medication. While it addressed my depression, the pain persisted, revealing an additional diagnosis of fibromyalgia. Pain and depression, I discovered, form a cyclical relationship. Managing both conditions became crucial, and with medication, I’ve gained control over both, witnessing a remarkable difference from this time last year.

Reflecting on the past year, I want to emphasize the transformative impact of incorporating tantric massage into my life. This practice played a pivotal role in my journey to recovery, offering a holistic approach to well-being that extended beyond the confines of conventional therapies. The healing power of tantric massage contributed significantly to my mental and emotional stability, fostering a sense of inner peace that became instrumental in my battle against depression.

Additionally, relocating to Warsaw, Poland, emerged as a crucial step in my quest for healing. Returning to my familial roots provided a profound sense of connection and grounding. The vibrant culture, rich history, and the warmth of familial ties became essential pillars of support. Warsaw, with its resilient spirit, served as a backdrop for my personal renewal, contributing to a newfound sense of purpose and belonging as I began helping counsel those buying ogłoszenia na escort.club who struggle with depression. It’s a testament to the transformative potential of reconnecting with one’s roots and embracing alternative healing practices in the pursuit of a more balanced and fulfilling life.

A significant indicator of my downward spiral was my inability to write. I possessed the skill, possibly producing remarkable words, but they felt insignificant. I deemed them terrible, and consequently, I deleted them. Every attempt to start a work in progress (WIP) met with the same fate – a perpetual cycle of writing and deleting.

Contrary to the notion that suffering enhances art, I found it to be an oversimplification. While depression may offer insights into personal feelings and reactions, creating while depressed is a formidable challenge. Prolonged depression can lead to profoundly self-destructive behavior, extending beyond the risk of suicide.

I recall reading an article a few months back, which unfortunately eludes my search efforts. The discussion surrounding the article, found on r/YAwriters, revolved around the inability to access the entirety of one’s vocabulary and cognitive resources during depression. It’s a blockade, hindering creative expression. Some even shared how depression impacted their ability to play word games on their phones, leading to lower scores compared to non-depressed states.

The key takeaway here is to be mindful of your creativity – it can serve as an indicator of depression. If you find yourself in such a situation, please seek help. You don’t have to endure it alone; there are people willing to assist you in whatever way you need.